Friday, March 18, 2005
Prisoner of War
Day 109:
I'm starving for a hug or some kind of affection. The guard said it'll be a long time before that happens again, if ever. The nerve! "I still have rights you know!" I should've said. I eat fish heads and maggot filled rice twice a day. My gums bleed nearly constantly. If I had a gun I don't know if I'd shoot myself or the guard. My cell mate lives in his head and only occasionally does he speak. He's attained enlightenment I think. He'll be dead soon. I wish there were mice but only cockroaches and spiders. I eat the cockroaches but just pick the legs off the spiders for amusement. 4 days ago I had a total of 8, yes 8 spider torsos all in a perfect little row. If I don't get their whole leg some of them kind of move around just a little bit and I have to put it back in the row with the others. They've dried up so now they're no fun anymore. I wonder if I can get the guard to drink from this puddle of piss that I've poisoned with the crushed up spider remains. I think he has a drinking fountain somewhere down that hall so my chances are miniscule at best. I wonder if he thinks about me when he goes home. When he's in the dark with his wife before he falls asleep, does he see my face in his mind? Can he smell the filth that is my life?
I'm starving for a hug or some kind of affection. The guard said it'll be a long time before that happens again, if ever. The nerve! "I still have rights you know!" I should've said. I eat fish heads and maggot filled rice twice a day. My gums bleed nearly constantly. If I had a gun I don't know if I'd shoot myself or the guard. My cell mate lives in his head and only occasionally does he speak. He's attained enlightenment I think. He'll be dead soon. I wish there were mice but only cockroaches and spiders. I eat the cockroaches but just pick the legs off the spiders for amusement. 4 days ago I had a total of 8, yes 8 spider torsos all in a perfect little row. If I don't get their whole leg some of them kind of move around just a little bit and I have to put it back in the row with the others. They've dried up so now they're no fun anymore. I wonder if I can get the guard to drink from this puddle of piss that I've poisoned with the crushed up spider remains. I think he has a drinking fountain somewhere down that hall so my chances are miniscule at best. I wonder if he thinks about me when he goes home. When he's in the dark with his wife before he falls asleep, does he see my face in his mind? Can he smell the filth that is my life?
